So I've been on this OkCupid website for a few months now. Been on lots of dates- some good, many bad - and had one brief relationship in the summer (if you can call something that which lasted only a month; it felt like one, or the beginnings of one that could have been.) Looking back, I'm so happy I'm not with that person anymore as we weren't well-suited to eachother at all, nor did we really have a terrible amount of things to talk about.
The theme of relationships has been HUGE in my life this past year since moving to New York. Whereas in Toronto, I hardly dated, in New York, it's been like dating boot camp, I have dated more than I ever have in my entire life. Is dating something you get better at the more you practice? (Like interviewing?...but let's not fall into that frame of thinking, the worst thing ever is being on a date where you feel like it's an interview, and you can't ever really relax because the person across from you is clearly going through their mental checklist of does-she-meet-my-criteria?)
Dating in New York. Dating. Dating? In New York?...WTF? Dating in New York = extremely frustrating.
There was an article I came across a few weeks ago from The Huffington Post by Juliet Jeske called Dating After Divorce In a City of Sluts. A recent divorcée, she writes about her own experience getting back into the New York City dating scene and describes it as "the survival of the sluttiest" and how it's mainly a "try before you buy" culture. In my short time of living here - one year September 1st! - I would have to agree with her to an extent. People get bored of eachother really quickly here, it seems, and if you're not willing to give it up, or something up, within a few times of meeting eachother, it's like, "next!"
Finding myself frustrated with the endless back and forth of messaging and dates that lead to nowhere, this morning, I decided to disable my OkCupid account. It will appear deleted to other people, but if I log back in, all my profile data will be restored (vs. just plain out deleting it permanently).
Another blogger, The Naked Red Head (hope I got the address correct), wrote how she disabled hers since she found it be a huge suck of her time, and that it made meeting someone feel "forced", taking away the "natural"-ness of meeting someone in-person for the first time and feeling an attraction - something you can't get from a picture on a screen and the witty banter of their profile write-up.
I think people write off many a potential date due to bad pictures. Wouldn't it add a more human element to the whole thing if you could post a video greeting of yourself, versus a written profile? This way, the people who view it could see how you look, sound, the way you move and your body language, most of which you can't convey via writing or pictures. How many people do you know that don't look anything like they're pictures?
Anyhoo, haven't posted on here for a long time now, and this is some of what's been on my mind as of late.
More to come.
The theme of relationships has been HUGE in my life this past year since moving to New York. Whereas in Toronto, I hardly dated, in New York, it's been like dating boot camp, I have dated more than I ever have in my entire life. Is dating something you get better at the more you practice? (Like interviewing?...but let's not fall into that frame of thinking, the worst thing ever is being on a date where you feel like it's an interview, and you can't ever really relax because the person across from you is clearly going through their mental checklist of does-she-meet-my-criteria?)
Dating in New York. Dating. Dating? In New York?...WTF? Dating in New York = extremely frustrating.
There was an article I came across a few weeks ago from The Huffington Post by Juliet Jeske called Dating After Divorce In a City of Sluts. A recent divorcée, she writes about her own experience getting back into the New York City dating scene and describes it as "the survival of the sluttiest" and how it's mainly a "try before you buy" culture. In my short time of living here - one year September 1st! - I would have to agree with her to an extent. People get bored of eachother really quickly here, it seems, and if you're not willing to give it up, or something up, within a few times of meeting eachother, it's like, "next!"
Finding myself frustrated with the endless back and forth of messaging and dates that lead to nowhere, this morning, I decided to disable my OkCupid account. It will appear deleted to other people, but if I log back in, all my profile data will be restored (vs. just plain out deleting it permanently).
Another blogger, The Naked Red Head (hope I got the address correct), wrote how she disabled hers since she found it be a huge suck of her time, and that it made meeting someone feel "forced", taking away the "natural"-ness of meeting someone in-person for the first time and feeling an attraction - something you can't get from a picture on a screen and the witty banter of their profile write-up.
I think people write off many a potential date due to bad pictures. Wouldn't it add a more human element to the whole thing if you could post a video greeting of yourself, versus a written profile? This way, the people who view it could see how you look, sound, the way you move and your body language, most of which you can't convey via writing or pictures. How many people do you know that don't look anything like they're pictures?
Anyhoo, haven't posted on here for a long time now, and this is some of what's been on my mind as of late.
More to come.
